Losing a best friend is not easy. Especially when you have been like sisters for over 8 years. On October 31, 1998, my bestest bud in the whole world went to Heaven. One thing is for sure, she was tired, worn out, and ready to go. Before she closed her eyes for the last time, she knew where she was going. The awesome medical staff had done all they could do. She had fought an ongoing battle her whole life, but the last 5 years were the toughest.

Up until April's sophomore year in high school, no one would have ever known that she was a CF patient. She seemed to be very healthy, could run, and do most everything else, but got a little more out of breathe than others. At home, 2 or 3 times a day, April would do breathing treatments that consisted of physio therapy and a breathing machine. Together these treatments would break up the mucus build-up in her lungs and help her breath better. Sometimes her parents would let me act as Ape's nurse and I got to beat on her back (physio therapy). That meant a lot, because that meant they trusted me to take care of my best friend. CF patients also have to take enzymes to help break down food in their digestive system, so before April would eat she would always swallow a whole handful of pills at one time with no trouble. People were always impressed when they saw her do this.

In June of 1995, April was put on the double lung transplant list. After 9 months of carrying around a pager and waiting for that phone call, she was one day away of being taken off the list. She was in such bad shape that her body would not be able to take the trauma of the surgery. Lying very sick in the hospital, on March 9, 1996, at about 9:00 pm, her nurse entered her room and informed her that her new lungs were on their way. April could not believe it! This was the scariest, but happiest moment she had ever felt. When I recieved her phone call minutes later, I was in shock. I, like April, didn't believe the news at first. I didn't know whether to cry, scream, or smile, so I did all three, and drove 90mph with my flashers on all the way to St. Paul Hospital in Dallas.

When I arrived, I ran to my best friend and gave her the hugest hug I have ever given. I was scared for her, but at the same time I was so excited. Her nurses told her that she had a while until the lungs arrived, so we just sat around getting her ready mentally. We told her how much we loved her and at a little before midnight, the nurses took her back to get prepped for the surgery.

For hours and hours April's family and many of her friends sat in the waiting room. Finally, in the latter part of the morning of March 10, the surgery was complete and she had done very well. She was then moved to ICU where only her family and very close friends could see her. She recovered very fast and was out of the hospital within a few weeks.

For the next 1 1/2 years April was doing pretty good. It was so neat to see her be able to walk again without oxygen tubes in her nose. We did things that we had never gotten to do before.

Towards the end of 1997, April started to go downhill. She was put back on oxygen and had to ride in a wheel chair, because she would get too out of breathe walking. This really upset her, but she never felt sorry for herself. The transplant was not the problem, it was the lungs she recieved, so if you are looking into a transplant, do not let this scare you. This was a rare situation and most transplants are a success. April's was a success, because it added almost 3 years on to her life, that she would not have had otherwise. She was the strongest person I have ever known. Her attitude is what kept her going. April was then put back on the lung transplant list for a second try.

In mid-October of 1998, April's right lung had a blow out and she was rushed to the hospital. She was put in ICU and things were not looking good. She would have these attacks where she could not breath at all. This would cause her to get upset and that would only make things worse, because her body would tense up. It was kind of like a rollercoaster, because one minute she was looking a little better and then she would have an attack, off and on. The doctors could not figure out what was wrong, because all of her stats looked good. Her oxygen level was way up there, blood pressure was good, heart rate was normal. After about two weeks, they moved her to a regular room, where she would be visited frequently by her doctors. She did very good the first day, but then she started having the attacks again.

A couple of days later, they decided to move her back to ICU. That was the last that I talked with her. During our visit, she had mentioned that she was tired of fighting, she wanted to go to sleep. On her way to ICU, she asked her dad if she was going to Heaven. That was when her parents and doctors made the decision to put her on a morphine drip. That way she would drift off into a peaceful sleep and never have to struggle again. She was ready, and it was time. It would have been selfish to keep her in this world any longer. She had made the decision herself.

Within an hour or so, April had slipped into a coma. Her doctors told us it would now be just a matter of time, maybe minutes, hours, or days. As sad as it was (and still is) this all could not have happened a better way. While we waited, we (family & close friends) got to hold April's hand and tell her our goodbyes. Although she was unconsious, it was our way of making peace with this angel that touched so many lives. As much as we knew we would miss her, we all knew in our hearts that she was going to be so much happier in Heaven without any pain.

A couple of days passed and on the morning of October 31, 1998, my bestest bud in the whole world went to see Jesus. As her parents walked into the waiting room, her other bestfriends (as well as mine) and I knew she had gone. We all held each other and cried. This is the day I knew would come. I didn't know what to do. She was my best friend and now she was gone. She was the one person who knew eveything about me, all my secrets, all my dreams. The pain I felt was something I had never had to deal with before. Even though I knew this day was coming soon, I hadn't really believed it. We got to go back into the room and see her for the last time, and I can not describe the sense of peace I felt seeing her, lying there with no pain, no tubes, no IVs, nothing connected to her frail body. Although she was not really there, she just looked happy. She did not have a painful death, just a peaceful rest.

Now I had to look ahead. After a death, there is a funeral. How would I handle this? Seeing my best friend in a coffin? This was going to be tough. A couple of nights later, at the funeral home, I felt a sense of peace that I have had ever since. At first, I freaked out seeing her lying there, but then, the longer I stood there, the better I felt. Once everyone had gone, except family, two of my sisters, two of my best friends, and I stood above April and we just talked for about half an hour, reminiscing. April was wearing two very special rings that we both have and an anklet I had given her years ago. Once the others had walked away, I touched our rings together and told her how much I missed making her laugh and seeing her smile. The next day would be the hardest, the funeral, the final goodbye.

Days before, April's father had asked me if I wanted to say a few words at the funeral. I was so honored, and of course I accepted. I was very nervous, but I knew I had to.

April could not have had a better funeral. Everything went so smoothly and it lasted over 2 hours, with more than 1,000 friends and family there. It was incredible. I don't know how I did it, but when I got up there and started to speak, my fear went away and I told stories of how wonderful a person my best friend really was. To me, everything could not have happened a better way.

Here is a poem I found for those of you who wonder what Heaven is like... "The Next Place"

This is APRIL'S Mom & Dad (DEBBIE & STUART, but I call them DEBS & STUY). I LOVE them SOOOO much! They are my 2nd parents and ALWAYS will be. :)

This is APRIL with her big sis, AMBER, on AMBER's BIG day. (APE got to be AMBER's Maid of Honor.) :)

April's 21st birthday was August 18 and of course this special day was celebrated. I was sadly not able to attend, because I am here in CO, but Stu & Debs and a few others took a cake and balloons out to the moselium where April is and had a little party. This is them while Debs is cutting the cake. :)

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