"Ace"

  POETRY & WRITINGS

   

AMY'S LITTLE BRAG BOOK

Ace Photo Album

 

On March 14, 1993, a litter of 4 male Schipperke pups entered this world. I first met them at 6 weeks, to choose my favorite. I picked the one who loved to do his own thing - later this translated into independence. I named him Shadow's Ace of Spades, but I called him Ace. I brought Ace home when he was 8 weeks of age.

He was such a little roly-poly!  He was so tiny, even at 8 weeks of age, and resembled a miniature black bear. The docked tail especially added to the bear-like resemblance, as did that slight potbelly.  The ride home had tired him out, as he'd whimpered part of the way. Upon arriving home, I took him out to conduct his business, then I introduced him to his new home.  I gave him a blanket I'd bought that said "Baby" on it. He looked at it and sort of sleepily rambled over to the a/c vent in the floor. Never having seen one before, he was surprised at the cold air that hit him in the face. He looked at his blanket and half wobbled in his little puppy way to go to it. He looked back at the a/c vent and I could tell he was working things out. He picked up a corner of the large blanket in his tiny teeth and pulled with all of his strength until he finally managed to drag it to the air vent. Curling up on the blanket, he went to sleep, and in so doing blocked any hint of cold air from reaching the humans in the room.   Ever since that first day, he has staked his claim on any floor vents, no matter who's house it might be.

He has been my pride and joy through the years. He and I went through 2 obedience classes when he was 5 years old and received his Canine Good Citizen title. We also worked with agility equipment and I considered working him in agility, since he seemed to enjoy that so much more than strictly obedience work. But life has a way of making such decisions for you, doesn't it?

Ace is so special - he's the one to whom I could teach silly tricks and make him perform with no complaints from him. After all, Mommy asked him to, and that was reason enough for him. At a Halloween party, we arrived as Batman & Batgirl, complete with capes & outfits! He performed tricks for the children such as sitting pretty, dancing, walking on his hind legs & speaking. He was a clown - the center of attention. He always managed to win over any visitor, even friends who were afraid of dogs. When he climbed into my lap, flipped over and asked for a belly rub (and don't think of stopping - he'd reach up with his paws and pull your hands to the spot he wanted rubbed!),
they became victims of his silliness, too.  He was there for me during a bad break-up in which I feared there would be retaliation and that harm would come to me. Ace was there during all of
those single years when I lived alone, and when I eventually married, he slowly formed a relationship with Bryce, my husband. He was & is my baby, my friend, my protector.

Then, the dark day arrived. May 26, 2000.  The day I'd always dreaded, but had hoped would be much later in his life. I was rubbing his belly & noticed how much weight he was gaining. His belly seemed so much fatter! And there were two small lumps underneath his hind legs, in the groin area. Not ready to face the reality of the "C" word, I pushed it away. I told my husband, Bryce, to keep an eye on him that day while I was work and let me know if Ace started acting different. I'd noticed that he was breathing a little heavier, but wasn't out of breath, and my mind chalked that up to his overweight problem, too. I decided to increase his exercise that weekend and watch his fat intake. He was on a very high quality food with no artificial preservatives, and I'd also fed him SeaMeal with it to supplement. I knew he wasn't getting too much fat, and I knew he had no deficiencies. But still the mind hopes...

Bryce called me at work with the devastating news. He told me that Ace had come up to him and had jumped in his lap. He looked at him with an expression that said that he wanted to tell Bryce something. Bryce felt Ace and found that there were two glands that had suddenly ballooned in size. I called my vet immediately and said that I feared lymphoma. They told me to bring him in immediately. On the way home, I fell apart. I knew, in my mind, that this wouldn't be an infection or something treatable. I just knew in my heart what it would be, and I began to mourn.

The vet confirmed my suspicions. He showed me the X-ray and explained how he'd ruled out blastomycosis or an infection. He showed me the lumps in his chest and said that this was mediastinal lymphosarcoma which affects the chest wall, and that it was extremely aggressive. The swelling was pressing on Ace's lungs and that is why his breathing was more noticeable. I told him that I knew about lymphoma and that I had already decided on my method of treatment. I didn't want chemo because Ace would be so stressed each time he needed to overnight at the clinic for treatment. He was a momma's boy, and that would be the hardest thing for him to handle. My vet agreed, and said that as huge as his glands were and the fact that every single gland in his body was enlarged, the chemo for him would probably be too hard on his little body. He was afraid that since chemo destroys the cells so rapidly, the cellular waste would be too much for Ace & that septicemia and/or renal failure could occur. Of course, every case is different, and what is right for me may not be right for someone else.  However, my decision was made to keep Ace at home with me and try to keep him as comfortable as possible.

He hasn't complained. He's been so tough thus far. I pretend for his sake that everything is okay, but sometimes I take time out to let it all out.  Crying has become a part of my days, and it helps to set aside "sob time".  Writing has also proven to be therapeutic, as I'll be able to read my writings after Ace is gone and remember him always.

I love him so much.

Amy

May 29, 2000

Ace's Professional Pose

So he's not show-quality, but he's great at pretending he's a champion! :o)