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Waltzing with Bears
Words and music by Dr. Seuss & Eugene Poddany, and Dale Marxen
Time: 4:23
MY UNCLE WALTER GOES WALTZING WITH BEARS.
IT'S A MOST UNBEARABLE STATE OF AFFAIRS.
EVERY SATURDAY NIGHT HE CREEPS DOWN THE BACK STAIRS,
SNEAKS OUT OF THE HOUSE AND GOES WALTZING WITH BEARS.
HE GOES WA-WA-WA WA-WA-WA WALTZING WITH BEARS.
RAGGY BEARS, SHAGGY BEARS, BAGGY BEARS TOO.
THERE'S NOTHING ON EARTH UNCLE WALTER WON'T DO
SO HE CAN GO WALTZING, WA-WA-WA WALTZING,
SO HE CAN GO WALTZING, WALTZING WITH BEARS.
I WENT TO HIS ROOM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
I TIPTOED INSIDE AND I TURNED ON THE LIGHT.
BUT TO MY DISMAY HE WAS NOWHERE IN SIGHT:
MY UNCLE WALTER GOES WALTZING AT NIGHT.
I BOUGHT UNCLE WALTER A NEW COAT TO WEAR,
BUT WHEN HE COMES HOME IT'S ALL COVERED WITH HAIR,
AND LATELY I'VE NOTICED SEVERAL NEW TEARS.
I'M SURE UNCLE WALTER'S BEEN WALTZING WITH BEARS.
WE TOLD UNCLE WALTER THAT HE SHOULD BE GOOD,
AND DO ALL THE THINGS THAT WE SAID HE SHOULD,
BUT WE KNOW THAT HE'D RATHER BE OUT IN THE WOODS.
WE'RE AFRAID THAT WE'LL LOSE UNCLE WALTER FOR GOOD.
WE BEGGED AND WE PLEADED, "OH, PLEASE WON'T YOU STAY?"
AND MANAGED TO KEEP HIM HOME JUST FOR A DAY.
BUT THE BEARS ALL BARGED IN AND THEY TOOK HIM AWAY.
NOW HE'S DANCING WITH PANDAS AND HE CAN'T UNDERSTAND US,
THE BEARS ALL DEMAND AT LEAST ONCE DANCE A DAY.
WE ASKED UNCLE WALTER JUST HOW IT FEELS
TO BE LIGHT ON YOUR FEET AND KICK UP YOUR HEELS,
AND HE SAID, "WE WILL SEE WHAT THE MUSIC REVEALS
TONIGHT WHEN THE BEARS TEACH US POLKAS AND REELS."
THAT NIGHT, WHEN THE MOON ROSE, WE CREPT DOWN THE STAIRS;
HE TOOK ME TO DANCE WHERE THE BEARS HAVE THEIR LAIRS.
WE DANCED IN A BEAR HUG WITH NARY A CARE.
IT ALL FEELS LIKE FLYING, THERE IS NO DENYING,
AND NOW MY PAJAMAS ARE COVERED WITH HAIR.
MY AUNT MATILDA WAS MAD AS COULD BE.
"WALTER, THAT RAT, NEVER WALTZES WITH ME!"
SO SHE TOOK HER FUR COAT AND REMODELED IT SO
SHE CAN GO WALTZING, AND WALTER WON'T KNOW.
SHE GOES WA-WA-WA WA-WA-WA WALTZING WITH BEARS.
RAGGY BEARS, SHAGGY BEARS, BAGGY BEARS TOO.
AND THERE'S NOTHING ON EARTH AUNT MATILDA WON'T DO,
SO SHE CAN GO WALTZING, WALTZING MATILDA,
SO SHE CAN GO WALTZING, WALTZING WITH BEARS.
I SNUCK OUT THE BACK DOOR AND OVER THE WALL.
THE SHADOWS WERE LONG, AND I'M NOT VERY TALL.
THEN A BEAR CAME RIGHT OVER AND OFFERED HIS PAW:
NOW WALTER AND I ARE THE BELLES OF THE BALL!
