Lick the resolution problem, for good

I don't make New Year's resolutions anymore. I'm old enough to know better.

For the most part, they're broken before the hangover is gone, which is particularly troubling to those who annually resolve to cut back on the drinking.

We've heard them all: Lose weight. Take better care of yourself. Make new friends. Find a faithful companion. Get more exercise. Take in a lost soul. Get to know your neighbors.

I have a better one, and it covers all the resolutions above.

Oh, I can hear what you're saying right now. "The last thing I need in my life right now is a dog."

Too busy? Too busy for what? A little more love in your life? Maybe that's your problem. Maybe you've been looking for love in all the wrong places. A dog will treat you better than anyone you'll meet at happy hour. Trust me. I've been to happy hour.

In a perfect world, every dog would have a home and every home would have a dog. And believe me, it would be a better world.

If President Clinton had gotten his dog a bit sooner than he did, he might not be in the mess he's in today. Dogs protect their owners from every kind of trouble, including themselves.

Yes, dogs are responsibilities, but what's wrong with a little responsibility? FDR had time for Fala, his Scottie, and he was running a country at war.

Yes, you have to walk them, but what's wrong with a walk every morning? Built-in exercise.

Yes, you have to plan for their care when you go away. So? As any dog owner will tell you, it's a small price to pay for total devotion.

You'll get more kisses than you ever imagined. You'll never be lonely again. You'll always have someone to talk to. Dogs are great listeners. Some of the best conversations I've ever had have been with my dog Murphy.

The whole tenor of your life will change --- from the smell of the dog's warm breath on your face as she stands by the bed, silently announcing the beginning of your day, to the sound of four feet galloping down the hallway when you put the key in the door at night. These are good things. Again, trust me.

A dog will quickly turn you into a fool, but who cares? Better your dog than your boss. I'm a fool for my dog and proud of it.

You'll live longer. Your house will be dirtier, but your blood pressure will be lower.

Even in workaholic Washington, the dog people have their priorities straight. They know work can wait another 30 minutes. There are more important things to do.

Dogs stop and smell the bushes. They give tours of back alleys and neighborhood lanes you never knew existed. They make you linger.

Dogs are better than children. Even my friends with children say that. As a dog friend of mine likes to say, children are for people who can't have dogs.

They rarely talk back, their education costs far less, they come with their own clothes, and they always eat what they're served. Plus, dogs appreciate every last thing you do for them.