Mother’s Party
I wake up
put on my school uniform
and yell for my brothers.
While they dress, I go to the kitchen
for a bowl of cereal.
Stunned at the sight of the refrigerator
tipped over on its side,
contents spilled across the linoleum floor
covered with ants.
I quickly place two pieces
of outdated bread into the toaster.
No towels, no mop, no broom,
but find some sheets stuffed
in the back of the bathroom closet.
Absorb the broken eggs, beer,
mayonnaise, milk, spaghetti sauce,
and syrup of unknown source
with the sheets.
My only relief was the lack of food
in the fridge
after my mother’s party.
The toast pops up,
and I fish through the rubble for butter.
Run to give my brothers the toast,
keeping them out of the kitchen.
Tell them I am staying home.
They ask no questions and set off for the bus stop.
I return to the fridge,
wondering if I am strong enough
to lift it upright.
I throw the soaked sheets
into the tub,
the floor still saturated with marbleized liquid.
Step on a jar fragment
cutting my bare foot.
Blood drips onto the floor combining with the refuse.
I watch as ants begin to drink
and drown in my blood, wishing
a fairy godmother could turn
them into something useful.
Find empty bottles and cigarettes
hiding in corners.
Fill a garbage bag with the late night clutter,
and kill the ants because godmothers aren’t real.
Then I sit on the sticky floor,
and silently drown in her mess.
1999