DIRT:
Dirt: Layers
of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter
against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor
of 15 and leave it alone.
COBWEBS:![]()
Cobwebs:
Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the
bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points
out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look confused and
exclaim "What? And spoil the mood?" (Or just throw glitter on them
and call them holiday decorations)
PET
HAIR:
Explain the
mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by claiming you
are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand-sewn play animals
for underprivileged children. (Also keeps out cold drafts in
winter.)
GUESTS:
![]()
If unexpected
company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room and close
the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home, rattle the
door knob vigorously, fake a growl and say, "I'd love you to see our
den, but Killer hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO
expensive."
My MOTTO: If
I can
LIVE in it, they can surely stand it for a 30 minute visit!
DUSTING:
If dusting is
REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on the coffee table
and insist that "This is where Grandma wanted us to scatter her
ashes."
GENERAL CLEANING:
Mix
one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of
water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly.
Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted
look, throw yourself on the couch and sigh, "I clean and I clean and
I still don't get anywhere."
As a last resort, light the oven, throw a teaspoon of cinnamon in a
pie pan, turn off oven and explain that you have been baking cookies
for bake sale for a favorite charity and haven't had time to clean... .......works
every time.
~Author unknown~
A CLEAN HOUSE IS A SURE SIGN
OF A BROKEN COMPUTER
