Titus 2 Moms
"Teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Titus 2:3-5 (NIV)
We have discussed this portion of scripture in previous mailings, but as I pondered on it the other day, I saw it in a whole new light. When I have studied this before, I always thought of it as meaning that the older women of the church should be teaching and mentoring ladies like us, who are in the midst of raising our children. And yes, that is true. But let's look at it from a new perspective. If we are mothers of daughters, then WE are the "older" women, and the daughters are the "younger" women. (For those of you who have sons, please continue reading. You will find some information that can be applied to sons as well.)
We teach our daughters more by example than by our words. We have all heard that phrase "actions speak louder than words." Children are smart, and they can pick this up at a very young age. So, we need to be very careful of what our actions (and our words) are teaching them. Are we modeling a good example of Biblical love to our husband? If not, then dear daughter is learning an unbiblical way to love her future husband. Are we careful to honor and respect our husband? If not, we are teaching our little ladies to do the same thing when they are older. Do we whine, nag, and manipulate to get our way with our husband? If so, then by our poor example, we are teaching our daughters to do the same thing to get what they want. Do we find ourselves screaming most of the time? If we are, then we are teaching them to react to situations from their flesh rather than responding to them through God's Spirit who lives in us. Do we refuse to submit to our husbands? Here again, if we struggle in this area, we are showing a poor example to our children.
It is very important for daughters not to be allowed to back talk to their fathers. They must learn to respect Daddy. If we don't train them to respect him, then how can we expect them to respect their future husband? If we don't take a strong stand in this area, then they will perceive that this behavior is acceptable in a marriage.
Sons must not be allowed to walk all over their mothers or be disrespectful toward them. This is a critical thing for them to learn. If we don't train them correctly in this area, we may end up raising a son who could lean toward being abusive to his future wife, be it verbal abuse, mental abuse, or physical abuse.
Let's keep in mind that a child left to himself/herself disgraces his mother. (Prov. 29:15)
I have read many times that the person who has the most influence on people is their mother. That is a heavy load for each of us to carry. That is why it is so important for us to learn to stay connected to the vine. (Jn. 15) We must remember that apart from Christ, we can do nothing. (Jn. 15) But, with Christ, we can do all things! (Phil. 4:13)
© 2003, Stacy R. Miller