rhapsodie

LEGAL STUFF: Copyrighted 2004 - 2006 by Adrienne Lee and Miranda Rafferty. Non-original characters, if applicable, are used without permission under "Fair Use" doctrine. The author reserves all rights attached to all original aspects of this work. This is a work of fiction.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: A rhapsody in music is a one-movement work that is episodic yet integrated, free-flowing in structure, featuring a range of highly contrasted moods, color and tonality. An air of spontaneous inspiration and a sense of improvisation make it freer in form than a set of variations. Sergei Rachmaninoff's set of variations on a theme by Niccolò Paganini are so free in structure that the composer called them a Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini.

From the sidewalk, Olivia looked up. She saw a faint cast of flickering blue against the ceiling. Beyond the living room, the rest of the house was dark. She checked her watch and wondered: Was she still up watching TV because she couldn’t sleep? Or did she leave it on for the white noise, to block out the other random noises that would seep into her dreams and turn them into nightmares? They never talked about that night, but she noticed the little changes in her lover’s routine. Whether she admitted it or not, the shooting had left other scars besides the one on her shoulder…

With a deep sigh and forceful determination, the detective pushed away her hate and anger towards the Powers that Be, and slipped her key into the lock...

In the apartment, she checked and discovered the empty futon. “Hey, boy,” she whispered, as the shadow of a cat appeared, and rubbed against her leg. Reaching down, she stroked his head and smiled when a low vibration began in his chest. “All right.” She patted him on the rump. “That’s it for now,” she said, and turned back to the door, taking care to make sure all the locks were secured and the alarm system reset.

Under the window, the light from the streets bathed Alex’s features in a soft glow. Fair tresses, from restless slumber, fanned out on the pillow, shining almost like a halo. Briefly, Olivia wondered if Alex had once again changed her hair color, and if one day, it would be sunlit blond again; not that it really mattered. At moments like this, the detective could believe in miracles. She was sure her lover was an angel, or at least a descendant of one - a divine gift from above. She was definitely beautiful in the most heavenly way…

When she finally remembered to breathe, she also noticed the sliding weight of her backpack. Quickly, she grasped the handle, and set the luggage down gently before it could fall. Equally noiselessly, she removed her down coat, and draped the length on the bench at the foot of the bed.

Suddenly, Olivia felt the urgency; she needed to be near Alex. A few short steps and she was there, right there. She couldn’t resist; she had to touch. Bending over her sleeping lover, she kissed her softly on the cheek.

“I’m so sorry,” Olivia apologized quickly. Sitting down and sliding her arm around her lover’s shoulders, she pulled her close. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” She turned the anguish into a quick kiss. “I shouldn’t have…”

“Hey.” Alex halted the other woman’s self-flagellation with a soft touch. “Really, it’s all right. Just a little jumpy today." Just somehow more than other days, she added to herself. “Too much black tea, I think.” Before Olivia could comment, she asked, “How are you?”

This particular day of the year was never good for the brunette even under normal circumstances. This night, however, she looked especially pensive. Choosing not to confront the lie, Alex reached up, and pushed back the long bangs hiding her lover’s eyes. “You’re early,” she observed simply.

"I decided to grab the last flight out. I've missed you.” Olivia explained. Elliot, true friend that he was, put on the siren as soon as they got into the car. He did it with a puckish smile, and a boyish complaint that they hadn’t had the occasion to do it lately, so she couldn’t protest. Truth be known, she didn’t know if she would have objected to breaking the rules. She didn’t dwell on it, just as she tried not to think much about how they had delayed the plane to wait for her. She was just glad to be with Alex for the extra night. Her Monday morning red eye flight would come all too quickly.

Settling into their closeness, Olivia buried her face in her lover’s hair. “You smell good,” she sighed, nuzzling her neck. “It’s good to be here, with you.”

"Hey, Oliver.” The brunette chuckled when a furry head butted her arm. “Coming back for more, huh? So how's my boy?" Trilling loudly, he rubbed his face against her petting hand. She scratched him under the chin and behind the ears until his purr sounded like a small running motor. With another whine, he plopped down on the bed and presented his belly for the same treatment. “My,” she said, a little self-consciously, wondering if her lover was laughing at her.

"Guess he's claiming you for himself." Alex laughed gently, reaching in to join Olivia. Impossibly the purr machine increased in volume. “Should I be jealous at my cat?”

The women looked at each other and grinned. “Maybe I should go sleep in the cat house?” Olivia quipped, and got a slap on the thigh for her suggestion. “What? I’m sure he won’t mind.”

"Then I think I can find my clothes." She smiled and leaned over for another kiss. “I should go,” she sighed, pulling away from her lover’s lips. “You’re too kissable.”

"Happy Nirvana Day." Alex reached up and sealed the sentiment with a light, undemanding kiss. Right now, it was the best way she knew how to handle the situation. Maybe one day, that would change, she hoped.

"Oh. Thanks for my roses. And Elliot, too. He says ‘thanks’." Olivia had thought the flowers lovely, and it was sweet of Alex to send them, but they went to Kathy regardless.

"I'm not sure she counts them. And if she does, I'm sure she thinks the florist was just swamped or something getting ready for tomorrow," Olivia speculated with a shrug of her shoulders. It had never occurred to her to ask. The less she thought about the anniversary of her birth, and how her conception might have ruined her mother’s life, the better.

Alex watched as her lover disappeared into the darkness. Momentarily, she heard the closet door slide open and shut softly. The bathroom light came on a second later. Soon there was the shower running. She turned, and picked Oliver up. He lifted his head with half-opened eyes, and when she placed him on her side of the bed, he went back to sleep without skipping a beat. With one last glance at the sliver of light a few yards away, she resettled under the blankets. Soon, she too drifted into slumber…

Sometime later, Olivia returned. She placed her watch next to the Little Twin Stars clock and climbed carefully into the cocoon. Carefully, she draped her arm around Alex’s trim waist, and held her breath when the blonde sighed.

Sensing instinctively Olivia’s protective warmth, Alex snuggled in, molding their bodies until they were perfectly aligned, pressing out all the air space between them in the process. Finally satisfied, she pulled the surrounding arm tighter about herself.

Her lover’s contented whimper and ensuing light snore made the brunette smile. Her smile widened when the cat followed suit, and readjusted his length against his human’s legs.

In the hazy light of the morning, she watched Olivia, lying silently beside her. The detective looked almost petulant, or deep in thoughts. She wondered if and what she was dreaming. Very carefully, she reached out, and ran the flat of her thumb between dark brows. Slowly, the furrow dissolved, and the corners of her closed eyes relaxed. It almost looked as if she was smiling now.

Am I in your dream? She wondered as she caressed her lover’s features with the faintest touch, barely grazing. It was something she discovered petting her cat. He would start rumbling as he ease deeper into sleep. Clearly, it works on you, too. She thought with a slight grin.

And she waited, time being inconsequential this morning. Less than six months ago, Alex Cabot would have roused her lover, dragged her into the shower and out the door for their morning run. That was assuming they didn’t have to go back to the precinct to work on cases that touched their hearts and consumed their lives. On Alex Cabot’s rare day off, she would still wake up at the crack of dawn, and Olivia Benson would have to tempt her to stay in bed.

It wasn’t that she cared any less. When she was at the office, she still worked hard. Now that she had found her way around her job and the city, she started getting in earlier and staying a little later when her volunteer duties allowed. Every chance she got, she networked with the judges, their clerks, even the prosecutors with whom she shared an office building. Lately, she had discovered that, for the most part, everyone was on the same side. Ruthless, zealous defense was only necessary in the political cases, the ones the newspaper reading public cared about, like guns and extreme violence. For more minor transgressions, unless her clients were repeat offenders, her opposing counsels were ready to accept her recommendations.

The satisfaction she felt upon winning each case came more often and less burdened these days. It was definitely easier to watch children who were too eager to play grownups embraced by their relieved families than silent victims who struggled to survive.

Finally, with a happy sigh, Olivia released her hold around Alex’s waist and turned onto her back. Taking advantage of her freedom, the blonde eased out from under the covers, and deposited a small feathery kiss on the detective’s nose. Without stopping to think, she readjusted her pillow so that it lay lengthwise on her side of the bed. With a final glance, she headed to the bathroom.

While she waited for the water to get hot, Alex opened the hamper, and removed the wad of clothing left by Olivia the night before. A slam dunk? No doubt.

She recalled the first time she saw her lover tossing laundry into the basket as if it was a ball, and how scandalized she was by the game. It used to grate on her nerves, just like the knife in the peanut butter jar did. Both habits seemed so uncouth, even barbaric then. Now amusement tugged at her lips as she shook the clothes out, folded them, and returned them to the container. Now, she couldn't imagine life without either one. And the unexpected rough edges, they only added to the detective’s charm.

Noticing the steam wafting from the shower, Alex quickly added her own clothes to the laundry. Stepping in and sliding the glass divider closed, she let the forceful jet pound away all the stiffness and stress of the previous day. When she finally felt renewed, she reached up to change the pressure of the water, and soaped her skin with a fruity fragranced cream.

And when Alex came out of the bathroom, dressed and refreshed, Olivia was back on her side, spooning the pillow Alex had left in her place. She smiled, realizing her lover was indeed exhausted if she slept so soundly.

At the kitchen counter, Alex sat with the paper spread out before her. She was about finished with the world news section when she sensed a much loved presence approaching. Perhaps the ability was something primal, precognitive or just because they had a special connection. It was a pleasant surprise Alex discovered not too long after she and Olivia became lovers. Initially, she thought it was purely coincidental, and sometimes she still didn’t trust her feelings, but it was there, always there, when she was receptive.

Casually, she flipped her hair, letting it rest on one shoulder. Then quietly, she waited, pretending to be absorbed with the newspaper. Her secret smile widened as Olivia approached. When her lover's lips grazed her neck, she shivered.

"Hi." She cleared her voice and leaned back to receive a kiss on the top of her head. She turned and smiled when, without asking, Olivia reached for her teacup and took a drink.

The brunette blinked at the radiant grin. She so wanted to capture it and hold it to her heart. Instead, she commented, "This is good," as she replaced the cup on the counter.

"Is that why you left one blank?" Olivia pointed to the crossword. Even without looking at the clue, she could guess what the answer was. "So we can share?"

"Good," she replied, leaning deeper into the strong embrace, and pressing a kiss to Olivia’s chin. She had missed Olivia, much more than she cared to admit, to herself and especially out loud. Their brief separation seemed unreasonably long, in fact impossibly longer each time they were apart. She wished they could be together always, and not be separated by circumstances out of their control. **A lot of people do well with long distance relationships,** she scolded herself. **Deal with it.** Still, it didn’t stopped her from adding, with a lingering touch to her lover’s jaw, "Now that you're here."

"So." Alex refused to let the mood overtake them. Hopefully, their compulsory separation wouldn't be forever. For now she was happy, at least she should be. Perking up, she asked, "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah." Olivia smiled and kissed the top of Alex's head. She had missed this, just the simple little things: Holding each other in the night, waking up to find Alex already at work on something, or just sharing a cup of tea… as if they had always had them, since the beginning of time. The moments were all special, all good, and everything was wonderful when they were together, like right now. "Thanks for letting me sleep," she said, and pulled her lover back into her arms.

"Rough week?" Alex asked sympathetically, knowing yesterday had been the hardest day of all. Olivia never looked forward to her birthday. She always gave the flowers from Alex to Elliot to take home to Kathy for Valentine’s Day. Sure, she enjoyed them at work, she always did. Somehow, she couldn't seem to make the pleasure last for longer than that.

"Want to talk about it?" Alex offered. Her light smile and the lift of an inquisitive brow let Olivia know she was happy to listen. Listening to each other vent was something they had always been willing to do for each other. She might not be the SVU ADA anymore, but it hadn't been that long to make her forget just how hard the job could be on a person.

Reaching forward, Alex kissed Olivia full on the mouth. "Mmmm…" An involuntary moan escaped as she slipped her hands under the edge of her nightshirt and lightly caressed soft olive skin. Slowly, she slid upwards, her kisses deepening as her lover's breathing caught, her smile widening as well wrought muscles and soft curves tensed and fluttered at her touch.

Finally, reluctantly, Olivia broke away from the connection and removed the slender hands from under her shirt. "I mean, besides me," she insisted and laughed gently at the growl that came from her lover's throat.

"Fine. Fine." Olivia let go of the blonde’s fingers, and threw up her arms for dramatic effects. "There’s no winning with you, is there?" In response to Alex’s closed lipped grin, she groaned. "Why do I even try?"

In front of the door to the bedroom, Olivia paused. Grabbing the brass knob, then turning to face her lover, she asked for the third time, "You promise you won't kill me?"

"Why, what d’you do?" Alex laughed. She couldn't imagine what the brunette could have possibly done that would make her so upset. Well, she supposed she could think of a few things, but they were a little far fetched, and wouldn’t involve Valentine’s Day.

Just as Alex looked into the bedroom, Oliver came strolling out. Briefly, she checked the interior. Everything seemed normal. There were no shredded rose petals on the bed, nor heart-shaped confetti littered all over the floor. The walls still gleamed, unmarred by bright graffiti of declarations of love. It was almost disappointing. So what was Olivia so worried about?

The detective was finally satisfied and pleased that Alex liked her gift so well. "Does this mean you forgive me for putting a hole in your ceiling?"

"Good. I thought he’d watch over you and keep the negative stuff away while I'm not here," Olivia explained the reason behind the gift with a smile.

"Wait. I thought you don't buy that sort of thing." Alex was surprised. Her lover had never believed in anything that couldn't be proven by fact or concrete evidence. Buddhist myths? Definitely not.

To Alex, that was better than any gift the detective could have given her. “Thank you!” She squeezed her lover passionately. “That’s, that’s so sweet…”

“Huh?” Bright blue eyes searched and followed shining brown ones. “What’s that?” She pointed to the envelop hanging from the sculpture, unsure how she had missed it before.

“Why don’t we…” Before Olivia could complete her thought, Alex was already dragging her towards the prize. “Go take a look?" She finished anyway, ready to pat herself on the back…

“Just open it,” Olivia sighed and reached up. With a gentle tug, the ribbon came loose from the sculpture. She was about to ball up the silk string when Alex took it from her. “What?”

It took Olivia her whole will to not bend forward and inhale the shy smile playing on lush pink lips. “What exactly?” She asked with a lopsided grin.

“All right, I’m sorry.” Olivia took the ribbon from her lover’s fingers and wound it carefully, looping its ends into a neat knot. “There.” She handed it back. “Are you gonna tell me?”

“I haven’t done it since we were kids, Ling and I… and I thought… Well,” Alex inhaled and made up her mind. “I got a scrapbook,” she finished quickly.

The brunette knew her lover didn’t mean that as a criticism, at least not directed at her. At herself, however… “Well,” Olivia chose her words carefully, “I think it’s really sweet. What’s going in it?”

In order words, when Olivia finally admitted her feelings out loud. She wasn’t going to argue with that. “So that’s why you asked if I still had them.”

“Yeah? Why wouldn’t I be?” A surge of nervous giddiness hit Olivia, and she joked, “I’ll have the scrapbook to hold onto if you decide to banish me to the cat house.”

As slender fingers peeled open the seal, the brunette held her breath in anticipation. Briefly, she wondered if and what part of that gift was also destined for the scrapbook. Ticket stubs no doubt. Maybe even the program booklet, or at least part of it? Now she would have to start finding things Alex could keep as mementos of their first year together. First year… She tried hard not to regret the time she wasted, and the time she was about to waste. Instead of sitting in a safety deposit box back in New York, the ring from Alex’s mother should be burning a hole in her pocket…

Alex’s laughter jolted Olivia back into the moment. Before she knew what happened, she felt soft hands gripping her face, and hot lips covering her own.

The scrutinizing azure and uninhibited smile made the brunette blush. She wished to dive head first into that brilliance. For courage, she gently cleared her throat. "I overheard you talking to someone about the premiere with the BSO and how you wished you could go..." That was as close as she would admit to eavesdropping. Shrugging her shoulders, she let her voice trail off.

"That was over three years ago. And you remembered?" Alex was stunned as she searched her memory and found only a vague recollection of the occasion. Was it during one of their many group lunches? Who was she talking to? Serena perhaps? Her lover didn’t only remember, she built a gift around the idea. “Wow,” was the only thing she could say.

"Yep." Olivia grinned, knowing she had completely surprised Alex, and pleasantly so. Years of training as a cop in keeping track of details definitely paid off. “Beethoven's Fourth is also on the program," she said, barely keeping the pride in her voice. “I know it’s your fav…”

"Oh, wow! Thank you!” Alex kissed her soundly, and clapped her hands together. Then abruptly she stopped, and smiled a conscious smile. "Thank you!” She said again, and stared at her lover in wide-eyed awe.

Olivia chuckled, she always enjoyed seeing the little girl side of her lover, a side so unlike her serious attorney demeanor. Secretly, she was pleased that she could bring out Alex’s hidden self. “So I did good?”

With a happy trill, Alex pulled Olivia in for another kiss and a hug. “It’s tonight,” she read from the tickets before clasping them to her chest. “Can’t wait. This is so exciting.”

"Good. There's this place I've been dying to try." That was one of the things she missed being in New York, with Olivia, exploring the city and seeking out different cuisines and places to eat. Guess they would have to find their adventures where they could.

"Walking distance?" Olivia asked hoping it was somewhere nearby. Normally, she wouldn’t mind, wherever they go, but she had other hungers to feed, too.

"Yes. And maybe after breakfast, you'd like to go shopping with me?" Alex looked hopefully at her lover, and hugged her arms underneath her breasts, bracing herself for any smart-alecky remarks that might come her way.

"Are we going to be here all day?" Olivia asked impatiently. She was beginning to sound whiny. They hadn't been there that long, and normally she liked shopping, but Alex was acting as if she was going to take forever. There were many other things the brunette would rather be doing than inventory Pottery Barn.

A blind person could tell her lover didn’t want to be there. "If you want, I can come back some other time. We can go home or find something else to do,” Alex proposed sincerely and smiled.

As much as Olivia wanted to take the offer and run, Alex’s concession changed her mind. For whatever reason, this shopping expedition was important to the blonde. Otherwise, she had no doubt they would be back at the condo jumping each other’s bones right after breakfast. "It’s okay. Let’s shop.”

Without asking for a clarification, Alex began moving away. Did she sway her hips just a little more on purpose? Olivia wasn’t sure, and Alex didn’t let her find out.

"Forget I said that,” Alex offered with a small smile. After Olivia’s last visit and their quasi-fight, she realized how vital it was for the brunette to be a part of this new life. No matter how trivial, what to buy for the apartment would be a way include her. “I've decided to take a chill pill since."

"We spend an inordinate amount of time in them. So you might as well be comfortable in your surroundings," Alex explained, and looked away. Picking up the nearest thing, she pretended to be completely captivated by it.

Remembering the vibrant and luxurious linens in her lover’s old apartment and the current white ones that were actually a little bit coarse, Olivia agreed, "Yeah, I was wondering if they were government issued or something…” Then the hideous-looking napkin ring in her lover’s hand caught her attention. “You like that?”

“I suppose.” But they were so not like you, Olivia wanted to say. Instead, she teased, "You know, we could spend more time on the futon, or in the bathtub... And there’s always the kitchen counter..." The brunette suggested with a knowing leer, and enjoyed the flush spreading across her lover’s face as she continued. “Remember the kitchen counter?”

"Just pick the sheets, Olivia," Alex ordered. Exasperated and more than a little flustered at her quick reaction to her lover's comments, she added for good measure, “Otherwise, I'm getting the frou frou red daisies print.”

**Guess tableware will have to wait,** Alex decided with resignation. With a small sigh, she brought her attention to the safe and uninspiring bookshelves…

"You're forgetting the striped set," Olivia reminded. Taking a sip of her skim latte, she wondered what was wrong. She thought Alex would like the color, it was delicate and feminine, and so very much like the blonde.

"Sage and pink stripes. Pink," she repeated. Not only was she surprised at the choice, the particular shade also gave her pause. **You couldn’t possibly…** She shook her head and stared into her Italian soda.

The strained exasperation in her lover’s voice did not escape the detective’s trained ears. "Have I told you how yummy you look in your pink broadcloth shirt?"

“You never complained.” Olivia smirked, knowing the cause of her lover's embarrassment. It was the same tint of pink Alex turned whenever they made love. The same radiant glow her skin took on when her arousal took control.

“It does bring out the color of your eyes, you know, when you didn’t,” she squinted, so that Alex knew she was referring to her contacts. Hazel was not a hue she wanted to get used to. “Hm.” Quickly, she moved on, “Maybe I was just too mesmerized to do anything…”

“Yeah, right, the place is half empty.” Besides, Olivia would love for people to know they were together, sort of the ‘I’m with her, and you’re not’ thing, chil